It was other people’s turn to do the cooking tonight so I pulled up my portable camp chair and started lusciously swigging a beer. I was feeling tired from a day of drinking rum and was looking forward to having some food to sort me out, which arrived in good time. After scoffing down the chicken and potato meal quicker than an obese American eating a McDonalds, I felt like less of a corpse. Although it was my turn to help out with the washing I decided to leave this to others more deserving and sipped another beer before the drinking games – and goon – started again as darkness set in.

With spirits high a bundle erupted between myself, Mark and the Scousers. I relished rubbing people’s heads into the sand and fending off the attempted onslaughts. As usual poor Mark bore the brunt of it all. I performed an elbow drop on his head before administering a solid knee to the back, which seemed to finish him off as he lay motionless face down in the sand. “Victory,” I declared with one foot resting on his face, positioned in a triumphant pose. I felt a bit sorry for Becky whose pair of glasses got smashed in the melee, rendering her virtually blind for the rest of the trip. “At least you’re only missing out on a morning of seeing stuff,” I said helpfully, doing my best to put a positive spin on matters and save myself some guilt.

“Thanks Steve for that,” came the sarcastic, slightly miffed, response.

“Well if you want to play with the big boys then you’ll get hurt,” I said, helping her to see that, in fact, it was really her fault. “I think it was Mark who broke them when he jumped on you though,” I added, attempting to soften the blow and divert attention away from me. Apportioning blame didn’t seem to make her feel any better but at least I could look in the mirror knowing I had tried.

By now a load of campfires had been set up and people were huddled in groups drinking and chatting just like the night before. With no bars or clubs this was as good as it got with the nightlife. But people really were making the most of their limited options. An amorous couple, who had probably known each other for all of five minutes, had been spotted by Sam cementing their relationship just over a mound where they thought no one would see them.

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Baring-All-Down-Under-Confessions-ebook/dp/B01GEE5JZQ/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1464772205&sr=1-1&keywords=steve+deeks

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Baring-All-Down-Under-Coast-ebook/dp/B01GEE5QVS/ref=sr_1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1464772438&sr=1-2&keywords=steve+deeks